so if anyone wants to give me half a birthday present it would certainly be appreciated. Apparently it is also the first day of 2009, which I am sure it is easy for us all to overlook in light of my turning thirty two and a HALF. I hope you are all starting off the year right, and have high hopes for big year. I know we, here at TWC are planning some really big things, and although we have been saying that for a while we really do mean it. You will see if you just bare with us.
2008 was a huge year, and I would go over all of the important details with you but we can just let Mad Skillz handle the RAP UP. I have really big plans for 2009 myself. I feel like there is a lot to look forward to, and I say that every year but these time I mean it. I will finally take over the world and sit atop my throne with scores of naked women serving me ice cold Crystal Lite, and quesadillas (Seriously I have my earthly reign all figured out). Since most of you have been loyal followers there will be cabinet positions for many of you.
- Nick will be the Minister of tall People in Jordan shorts and Motos.
- Boston Chris will of course hold a high ranking position in the department of swag, and I don't mean swagger ( I hate that term, and hate that rappers are now judged on that as the most important factor). He will be the official shopper for the court.
- Mannie will make the only shoe anyone will be legally allowed to wear.
- Adam will be busy, first of all I need him to design and construct my throne and then the rest of the furnishings for my palaces.
- McLuda will be the official documentarian (I am not sure if that's a real word, we shall see when I spell check) and photographer for the court.
- Stabwound Joe will of course be the Minister of Security and Karaoke (no point in hiring two people to deal with these areas).
- The international visitors to our blog will be asked to take charge of their respective countries after I force the current leaders to work in the TWC laundry room.
- Mr. Obama will in fact do most of the actual leading of the nation, as I will be for the most part a figure head.
- I am making Spank the all powerful leader of Texas (the only state to ever be it's own country will again be it's own country).
- There are many other positions available, and some of you will be brought on in various consulting capacities.
Also I would be interested to hear if anyone had any good New Years Eve stories to share. What did I do?
Stayed home, killed off a bottle of Paul Masson, played some Guitar Hero, and watched Eagle Eye to the sounds of neighborhood gunfire and fireworks . I know it sucks getting old folks.
"Now bitches bring me the maidens of the court before I become angry!"
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I also sat at home, as you know due to the drunken phone convo (you too chris cool) and watched Eagle eye with the lady. Watched some Katt Williams too.
I polished off 2 bottles of champagne, countless beers and a fantastic dinner that consisted of a ribeye steak (the best one ive had at home in a LONG time), fresh green beans with bacon, and a baked potato with tillamook cheese and bacon.
Im now on a diet. But it was worth it.
I dont remember if i actually made it to midnight, but i woke up to an empty champagne bottle next to my bed so im thinking i probably did, although in bed watching The Departed.
That all sounds like a pretty lame, old guy new years. But ive never been much into new years eve so this was actually my best one in a long time.
Heres to 2009.
you weren't too drunk to dial, so you weren't too drunk to dial.
Big things my dude, wish you nothing but the best in 2009. Course now I can claim I waited a year on my package.
;)
I know it doesnt count for much but i consolidated all your stuff, put it into a smaller box, and moved it closer to the front door.
its been there for a week or so now, but cmon, baby steps.
Can we change "Minister of Security and Karaoke" to Minister of Karaoke, and Ultraviolent Badassery?" Somehow "security" conjures up images of a fat dude with a mustache thumping on Nancy Kerrigan's knee.
sure can Joe, that is the nice thing about leading with an iron fist. I can do what I want, whenever I want. THat said how is the description you just gave not an accurate description of how you would approach the job?
-I accept my position with honor
-what did I do on New Years? worked in my condo/sweatshop "shoe factory" and woke up next to a half bottle of Pepsi and gunfire
-Tillamook cheese > all other cheese (if you can even call it cheese)
- Im not sure why I havent picked up Eagle Eye yet
-no more Mr. Nice Guy in 2009 (I forgot the actual slogan you came up with for 2009)
I'm gonna need some TWC apparel in that case.
I will be paid handsomely with naked women and quesadillas for building all this furniture right. Like the Chris above me said(seriously how many chris' can there be on one blog?) I'll be needing some TWC apparel too.
Oh and since we're sharing new years stories, I hit up a house party in the mountains. Good times, fairly relaxed and better than the usual dress up and spend $200 at some shitty bar full of pretentious assholes. The party was a friend of a friends, so I knew like 5 people, but it was still chill.
i know, im late on this... love the cabinet position though..
what can i do to help your cause and speed this acquisition of the world up?